Friday, July 19, 2013

Patience is not my virtue...

My online fertility medication pharmacy- Freedom Fertility- just called to fill my prescriptions and set up a delivery date for my August cycle.

I didn't know what medications I was going to end up with because the APN that I met with had to run them by Dr. S and the billing department to see what would be the best course of treatment and what was covered best by my insurance.

So I never knew what exactly we were exactly doing this cycle.

The winners are-

Menopur w/ Gonal-f w/ Ovidrel trigger, Dexamethasone daily, and Endometrin post ovulation.

I’m a little intimidated by the Menopur and Gonal-F protocol. Most of what I can research online shows them used together during and IVF cycle and I will be doing mine with IUI.

I do see a lot of success stories out there though! --Yay!

What I can tell is that I will likely be on lower doses with the IUI- I should have asked when they called, but I was at work and needed to get the order placed and off my personal phone.

I really hope this is the cycle. That these are the medications that I need to make our little baby a reality.

Everyone always says its the right combo of medications at the right time. So maybe this is it.

I read an awesome quote by TWLOHA's website today.

-for those that don’t know TWLOHA stands for to write love on her arms the following is their mission statement:

To Write Love on Her Arms is a non-profit movement dedicated to presenting hope and finding help for people struggling with depression, addiction, self-injury, and suicide. TWLOHA exists to encourage, inform, inspire, and also to invest directly into treatment and recovery.

Anyway their quote today-

"If today is not the moment for you, don't lose patience... think that there will still be tomorrow and there will be happiness." - Cherice

I think this was todays gentle reminder for me to be patient. Not a super amazing trait of mine.

Im working on it though. This journey has taught me so much about patience and the lack of patience that I have..

Happiness is coming and everything is going to work out just the way its supposed to.

I just need to be mindful and continue to work on my patience.

Someone I casually work with -who knows absolutely nothing about our struggle to get pregnant told me she had a dream about my husband and I yesterday.

Very very weird by the way. She even admitted that she wasn't sure if she should tell me if she was having weird dreams about me (shes pregnant too by the way...)

She said she dreamt that I was about 9 months pregnant and loading a stretcher into the ambulance and she was yelling at me.

I guess that gave me hope. Maybe another gentle reminder from the man up stairs that its coming.

Keep patient and calm and everything is going to work out just the way its supposed to.

So that is what I am doing. Eating better, drinking plenty of fluid, decreasing my gluten, walking every night, laughing as much as I can, not letting small things stress me out, being kind to everyone I encounter and living life right now.

I truly can not wait to go to my acupuncture appointment on Monday.

I’m looking forward to the future and what is has to offer us, but I'm also not going to let the future take away from my present. This last cycle really tore me apart inside. I felt very defeated and I truly let it get to me.

I'm going to try my best to keep my chin up and keep moving forward.

Happiness is just ahead.

I can feel it.

-I would love to hear any Gonal F w/ Menopur protocol stories you lovely ladies have..


  1. Love the dreams!!! Those definitely have meaning and excited to hear about your lifestyle changes as well :)

    1. Thanks! I was so taken back but I think it really did mean something. I'm so glad she shared it with me instead of keeping it to herself!